I lost passion for finance believing management and leadership are not meant for me. This went on for one year and I didn’t know how to help myself. If you’re feeling somehow disconnected, fed up or even frustrated in a job which used to be your dream job, I can totally relate. I wrote this article to guide you through this confusing time.
That one year felt horrible. I spend my working days frustrated and couldn’t sleep properly. Overanalysing if it’s the right time to quit my job kept me up at night. You know … these two things didn’t help me at all. What did?
I will share with you 3 tips today as a starting guidance. I am saying “starting” because it’s not a situation you’d be able to fix overnight or with one coaching session … and if other coaches tell you otherwise, run away … it’s my honest tip.
So, what can you start doing today to get unstuck and re-connect with the job you used to love?
Tip No 1: Stop pretending
I have an invitation for you. You need to get really honest with yourself. It’s time to stop pretending. As much as this can sound like a harsh sentence to you right now, it’s meant with kindness. My clients appreciate me for my direct but kind approach. I hope my honesty will help you open a new perspective and spark curiosity.
This was the first thing that helped me to move forward.
Once I got to the point of disconnecting from the job and career, I loved for so many years before, frustration and all sorts of negative emotions started to kick in. I secretly wished it all went away, but it didn’t. I didn’t know how to deal with it all. All I could think of was how to run away from it all.
If someone asked me “How are you or how is your job?” I’d pretend everything was just fine and great.
I didn’t want to seem weak nor give away a single signal that the truth was actually the opposite. Deep inside my soul was screaming. I used to love what I did, I worked hard to get there and I couldn’t understand what was happening. I didn’t do anything about it, simply because I didn’t know what or how. I used to find it hard to get up on Monday morning and take an hour long journey to get to my job, but I put my brave face on pretending all was fine while thinking “I need to find a different job.”
I spent countless evenings searching online for a different job. Nothing seemed good enough or my thing.
I felt like I was running in the same circle with no hope for change …
My working life carried like this for one more year, until I decided to fulfil one of my travelling dreams. I went to visit India for two and half weeks. I returned from holidays and realised it got even worse. I couldn’t cope with the workload; I felt even more agitated at work and couldn’t focus on my usual tasks. I was already taking coaching sessions discovering what my passions were and within a few weeks decided I had enough. I walked in on Monday morning and handed in a notice. I couldn’t take it any longer and decided to take a career break but above all. I had to stop pretending I was happy working like this! Because I wasn’t!.
From that moment on I felt relieved and things started to improve. I didn’t have to pretend anymore. When people asked how I was doing or why I quit my job, I was honest why.
A little side note: If you don’t have savings or an income that can support you during your career break, I don’t recommend resigning without having a plan B. It can make some people feel even more stressed. We are all different and if you feel like you had enough of your job and desire a change, you can start working on your career happiness plan while working in your current job.
Tip No 2: Discover what’s really going on
You may feel that the problem that keeps you stuck is lost passion or feeling disconnected from your job or career. Yet the root cause of your problem can be something completely different. Avoid making fast conclusions, dive deeper to understand the underlying issue.
Thinking I am not good as a manager and lost passion for finance, had me invest one year into discovering what my passions were and guess what. It took me all the way back to the beginning – to reaffirm that all I was doing previously was actually very much connected to my passions – leadership, education, coaching, helping others to feel confident about themselves.
What I wasn’t able to articulate and discover by myself was that I went through a burn out and the main focus of my job after two years changed in a way that wasn’t aligned with my talents any longer. So it started to drain me, as I wasn’t playing to my talents. I was also working a lot moving away from my personal goals. AHA moment … that’s why I felt irritated. I wasb’t able to uncover these underlying things by myself. I worked with coaches to understand the reasons.
Then I took a step back and learnt how to respond to stressful situations at work. I also had to learn how to pace myself so my passion doesn’t burn me out again!
This realisation inspired me to train in cognitive stress management coaching. I wanted to be the kind of leader who is able to spot when people are experiencing these difficult situations and help them to use stress as a positive catalyst for change.
If you’re right now thinking that the obvious reason for your lack of happiness at work is lost passion, consider talking to someone who can help you recognise what’s going on without any judgement. And if you don’t know anyone who may be able to help you right now, feel free to reach out to me. Take the benefit of free discovery call. You will find m contact details at the end of this blog.
Tip No 3: Re-connect with your passion through your WHY
One of the best things that help me to move forward fast and re-connect with my passions was describing my why and building a new vision based on my passions and purpose. You heard this already, right? It’s a trendy thing to talk about .. but it simply worked for me. It works for my clients! What else can I say … ?
Discovering my why felt like a catalyst. It inspired me both professionally and personally again. Apart from money and paying bills, I took into account how I wanted my job to make me feel, how I wanted to serve people and what I wanted to be remembered for. My why and inspiration became rather clear.
I want to help experienced professionals in 30s and 40s to stop feeling like a number on a payslip or working on an autopilot, so they can reclaim their success, joy and life power back.
I will share with you a few questions that I used in a workshop at a local college. This workshop was aimed at teachers but you can use it too. Simply replace the word teacher with your job/profession:
- What were your intentions that led you to become a [teacher]?
- What did you want to change? What did you want to achieve?
- Why being a [teacher] fulfils you (or used to fulfil you)?
- What do you want to create as a [teacher] in the future? What are you inspired to do?
- Who are the people you’d like to help as a [teacher] and why?
- What do you want to help them achieve and experience?
Give it a try and let me know how it went. I’d love to know if these questions helped you too. And if you somehow got stuck answering these, I am also here to help you to get unstuck.
Here is my email if you want to share your answers or connect with me: firstname.lastname@example.org
Author: AdriAna Kosovska
Certified coach & founder of ZERO TO DREAM JOB ACADEMY
Helping unfulfilled professionals and freelancers in 30s & 40s create a rewarding career
Dream job & Career Development | Stress management| Talents development